Re: Using Ferber method in everyday life

no.email@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
 wrote:
 If I don't pick him up, the cry turns into the an
> ear-piercing, red-faced, scream that wont stop until I hold him.

I'm intimately familiar with this particular mode of communication :-)

 I have a baby carrier, but I it isn't always
> practical, especially if I'm cooking.

I had a backpack carrier with my second and now I am a true blue believer
in
backpacks.  If I ever have another I'm getting the best one money can buy
:-)

> My friend suggested the Ferber method, but altering it to fit a
> daytime situation.

I've read the book.  It really isn't geared toward awake situations at
all.
It is purely a sleep thing.

> If I continue to pick my baby up,  and not teach him how to 'cry it
> out'  & comfort himself during the day - am I setting myself up later
> for a lot of problems, IE:  clingy child with social problems?

My first wouldn't play by himself until he was at least a year old.  I
held
him constantly...and when I wasn't dh or the sitter was.  He was a very
shy
toddler and has been transformed into a very social and talkative
preschooler.  He still likes to be with and have physical closeness with
his
parents.  He always picks hanging out with one of us over playing with
toys.
He is very normal when at preschool or when his cousins are over.  He
spends
significant amounts of time alone when he can be outside but not when he
is
in the house.

 If I
> somehow find it in my heart to let him cry for longer duratons, can
> that make him distrust me?  I'm really confused.

I honestly don't think it would work but I also believe babies are
resilient
and it takes more then 15 minutes or so of crying here and there to cause
any damage.  My second son did indeed cry from time to time because
sometimes both children had needs and I can only do one thing at a time. 
He
is happy, joyful, outgoing and trusting.

> Nightime there is no problem as baby sleeps just fine in his crib.

Well then I wouldn't rock the boat ;-)  If you must do something (like
shower or eat or take care of someone else) the baby won't melt and your
relation****p won't be marred forever if he cries.  However, I see no value
in making him cry to teach him something, it just makes everyone -
including
you - miserable!
--
Nikki
Mama to Hunter (4) and Luke (2)