My DD was a very high needs infant, who is now a very independant little
toddler. She is way less clingy and needy than other kids her own age. I
never let her cry it out. If she need me, needed to be held, or nursed
etc... I was there. I made good use out of slings, and baby carriers, and
my arms are in great shape. The only time I let her get upset/frustrated
was when she was learning a new task, and I would intervene when she got
past the point of frustration and into being upset. DD sat at 4 1/2
months,
was crawling by 5 1/2, first words at 8 months and walking at 10 months,
so
even though I still catered to her needs she still developed her
capabilities a little on the earlier side (I know that every child
develops
on a different rate, but for the people who believe that you can't
contiuously hold a baby because it will delay them from walking, crawling
etc...)
--
Michelle P
Ava Marie July 14, 2002
<no.email@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message
news:3f96f9cd.7733906@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> I am a new SAH mom and need advice. I finally have a baby after many
> years of miscarriage. This baby is the love of my life. In the eyes
> of my mom and friends, I have 'spoiled' the baby because I never let
> him cry. He just seems like a very happy, calm baby 24/7.
>
> Due to a family crisis - I can no longer lavish my baby with as much
> time and attention as he is accustomed.
>
> He is almost 5 months old and on some occassions, as soon as I put
> him down, and he sees me walk away (still within his vision at all
> times) he crys. If I don't pick him up, the cry turns into the an
> ear-piercing, red-faced, scream that wont stop until I hold him. I
> can be right in front of him touching him and he won't stop crying.
> It's so loud and distressing I wonder what my neighbors must be
> thinking!
>
> Mind you, he does play by himself with his toys and can entertain
> himself for quite some time, but other times he ****fts into
> 'high-needs mode'. I have a baby carrier, but I it isn't always
> practical, especially if I'm cooking.
>
> My friend suggested the Ferber method, but altering it to fit a
> daytime situation. Yeah, that lasted about 5 minutes. Because I am
> not used to seeing/hearing my baby scream-I broke down after a few
> minutes and picked him up. How can I not? As I held him against me,
> I had to hear him take those quivering intakes of air that babies do
> when they've been crying really hard. It broke my heart to hear him
> do that for 20 minutes. He's never done that before.
>
> If I continue to pick my baby up, and not teach him how to 'cry it
> out' & comfort himself during the day - am I setting myself up later
> for a lot of problems, IE: clingy child with social problems? If I
> somehow find it in my heart to let him cry for longer duratons, can
> that make him distrust me? I'm really confused.
>
> Nightime there is no problem as baby sleeps just fine in his crib.
> I'd like to hear any suggestions.
>
> Wimpy Mom
>
>
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